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Regression, These Are the Cardinals. Cardinals? Meet Regression
While it's a bit too tempting to take time in the lede to discuss what was the "potential Super Bowl match-up" of the year between the Packers and Patriots, or even the discussing the Ravens snatching...
View ArticleThe Stats Machine: Week 14, DeAndre The Giant
In many leagues, the playoffs have begun. I hope The Stats Machine was able to help you make it this far. Now it is up to you to bring home the hardware. In the meantime here are The Stats Machine's...
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We’ve Reached Peak NFC South
If you didn't notice, or if you didn't read yesterday's post, we are now travelling the December part of our football journey. And it's almost as if a few weeks ago, some misguided couple named their...
View ArticleKC’s Review, Week 14: The Week of Regrets
This week is my week of regrets.... quarterbacks I regretted sitting, wide receivers I regretted dropping, running backs I regretted starting, teams I regretted rooting for, and Saturday... where I...
View ArticleDisgraces and Delights, Week 15: Julio Jones Bathes in the Ancient Gardens of...
Has any one set your gaze upon the mystifyingly glorious Great Pyramid of Giza? Perhaps you’ve often thought about, as I have, about dedicating your lives to attempt to discover the whereabouts of the...
View ArticleStart ‘Em and Sit ‘Em, Week 15: Feed the Crow
It only took until Week 15 of the NFL season, but it looks like Mike Pettine actually wants to win games in Cleveland. After suffering through 13 games with Brian Hoyer as the quarterback, Pettine...
View ArticleDraftKings: Randle’s So Cheap, It’s Almost Like Shoplifting
It seems like so long ago at this point but you remember when Joseph Randle made headlines? No, no silly, not for how he played on the field. It was his shopping for a five finger discount that rose an...
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So Long, Regular Season. It’s Been Adverb Adjective.
So let me get this straight... there are three AFC North teams in the playoffs? No, I don’t care for this much AFC North in the playoffs. And I guess I should tackle the elephant in the room and...
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Divisional Weekend Round-Up: The Calvin Johnson Rule Strikes Again
Welp, what the refs giveth, the refs take away. Something like that. And so it goes for the Cowboys, who saw their season come to end, not with a Romonobyl, but with a whimper. After a "questionable"...
View Article2014 Rankings Retrospective: Running Backs
So we're back at it, loosely going over 2014 while also looking forward to 2015. It's an interesting exercise, if only because it's the most excercise I've gotten in a while. Also, seeing as how the...
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2015 Underrated: Lamar Miller
Lamar Miller was a surprise fantasy asset in 2014, ending as the No. 9 running back. His closing line was: 216 rushes for 1,099 yards, eight rushing touchdowns, 38 receptions for 275 yards, and one...
View ArticlePoints Per Dollar 2014 Edition, Heroes and Zeros
In my last post, The Legend of the Bid Button, and the first in this series, I examined and explained my strategy for approaching auction drafts. The key stat that I rely upon is "points per dollar"...
View ArticleThe Injury Report, Week 2: Dez Bryant Puts Broken Foot in Mouth
Some players are just known for certain things. Dez Bryant's "thing" is being passionate. Whether it's yelling at a teammate or celebrating a victory, he really gets into it, putting his feelings out...
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That’s so Chiefs
If you had judged this game by the first three quarters and half of the fourth, you might have thought that Monday Night Football had given way to Thursday's Prime Time to tenaciously make us feel...
View ArticleThe Benchwarmers, Week 2: The Better Version
Is the phrase, “Back in Black” work here? I’m currently wearing a white t-shirt, but oh well. This is the first of a weekly series I’ll be writing about arguably the most underrated part of anyone’s...
View ArticleDisgrace and Delight, Week 3: The Philadelphia Schmiegel’s
Greetings! I've just now pulled myself out of the filthy pit of wretchedness that losses from MY Seattle Seahawks and MY Buffalo Bills placed me in. Well, them and the mass quantities of drugs and...
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The Max Factor: Trouble in Manningdom
Well, I’m confused. This past weekend’s outcome were just weird. Some trash won, other garbage teams looked average; I don’t know what to make of this anymore. Everyone to 8-8! Well c’mon Max you dumb...
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Early Games Live Thread, Week 3
[caption id="attachment_37487" align="aligncenter" width="480"] Na na na na na na na nana, Na na na na nana, Gettin stabby wit it[/caption] With no other "marquee" match-ups for the early slate of...
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Big Ben Down
Ben Roethlisberger was forced from yesterday's game against the Rams when Mark Barron fell onto his leg, bending it awkwardly. While my initial reaction was to breathe a sigh of relief for all the...
View ArticleThe Max Factor: Brown, Bell, and Ben
We are starting to get more parity between teams. My 8-8 dream is dead. #$*%. I’ll get over it. Injuries are the most frustrating part of football. Every second play, someone gets hurt and I cringe and...
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